Hi my names bec im 36 with 3 beautiful kids. I was diagnoised with stage 1 bowel cancer last yr when i got told i had cancer i just cried to hear the word CANCER was a numbing feeling. I never though it would happen to me but it did i had mixed emotions and was numb to it not knowing what was next but not even what was next for me but for my kids. Will i get to see them go to high school or go from a kid to a adult or see them get married or have kids was all i could really think about.Once i really sat down after all the tears and how i was gunna tell my kids it finally hit that i had the C word and i truely felt numb.So how i prepared for it is quite a blur i guess i just put my big girl pants on and just took one day at a time to understand what was next and what it involved. I had surgery on the 22nd of october 2019 i had a right hemicloctomy surgery went well and the cancer didnt spread so no chemo or radiation so i kinda got lucky for now, i am almost at my 1 yr mark. So what the future holds i dont know but for now im just enjoying life to the fullest and thank that im still here to see my kids grow.

I survived cancer

The C Word

My partner died from cancer

My child died from cancer

My partner survived cancer

My child survived cancer

My partner has cancer

My child has cancer

I am a parent with cancer

My Story

Suddenly my otherwise healthy, fit, non drinking, regular gym going hubby has been diagnosed with Glioblastoma ( brain tumour in his Thalamus) and he has been told he has 12 months to live even with the radiation and chemo treatment he will start soon.We have a 13 year old son and an almost 15 year old son. We have been together and best friends for 27 years and will ( hopefully) celebrate our 18th year of marriage in November.what should I expect on this unwanted and terrifying journey of watching him die from Glioblastoma? How do I support my teenagers?our whole life has changed in just three weeks... 😢

My husband, aged 45 yrs, had just been diagnosed with Glioblastoma

4th of may 2020. I kissed goodbye my best friend, my dad after his long but short exit with every cancer possible. I can not stress enoigh how hard this has been on my family and especially me. I'm his little girl, we look identical. Act identical. His gone, I'm not it's so fucking unfair.

Daddys girl

When Cancer Won't Go Away

Welcome to the CanTeen Connect Parent Forums. Tell us about yourself. :)

Introduce Yourself!

Everyday Life

Should my grand-daughter be told about my breast cancer?
She lives with us on alternate weeks (our  son is her father) but her mother asked me not to tell her about it.
We think she should know as its something that she might feel excluded about, especially when I lose my hair (first chemo was today)
Unfortunately she lost her maternal grandfather to melanoma last year.
She was also seeing a psychologist because she was suffering from trichotillomania due to diagnosed depression and anxiety.  The school has a great counsellor who is helping her now.  
What should I do for the best?

I'm a grandmother with a 14 year old grand-daughter

Supporting My Child

Hi everyone! ☺️ My name is Fran. I recently joined Canteen as the Online Community Coordinator. I'm responsible for helping you get the most out of Canteen Connect.
 
Since I'm new, I'd really love to hear from you. 
 
What do you want to see more of? Personal stories? Information? Events?
Do you want to find and connect with parents in the same situation?
Do you need support? Coping strategies? Counselling?

If you want to share your thoughts privately, you can email online@canteen.org.au

We'd love to hear from you

Research

We have released&nbsp;a new app to support you through a cancer diagnosis!&nbsp;If you have ever been worried about what questions to ask or remembering&nbsp;all the answers, this app can help.&nbsp;Features&nbsp;of the Cancer? app include:<ul><li>Read question lists developed by other young cancer patients in the &lsquo;Prepare for appointment&rsquo; section (and add your own&nbsp;list)&nbsp;&nbsp;</li><li>Record your next appointment&nbsp;and listen back&nbsp;to answers&nbsp;in your own time&nbsp;&nbsp;</li><li>Use the &lsquo;My team&rsquo; section to keep track of who&rsquo;s who in your treatment team&nbsp;</li></ul>Download the app using the links below:&nbsp;<ul><li><a href="https://apps.apple.com/us/app/id1488397524">iOS</a>&nbsp;</li><li><a href="https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=au.org.canteen.teen.recall">Android</a>&nbsp;</li></ul>The Cancer? app project is a Cancer Australia&nbsp;Supporting People with Cancer&nbsp;Grant Initiative, funded by the Australian Government.&nbsp;

Use the Cancer? app to help you ask the cancer questions you need answered

Once the school is aware of your diagnosis, you can speak with them about the following supports they can tap into to help not only your child, but other students who may also be in a similar position.&nbsp;Recommend programs and resources&nbsp;Depending on the age of your child, tell the school about the programs and resources available from&nbsp;Canteen&nbsp;and Camp Quality.&nbsp;&nbsp;<ul><li>Canteen&nbsp;can deliver a tailored information session to staff or students (depending on your location), covering the impact of cancer and how the school can support the student affected by cancer.&nbsp;Canteen&nbsp;also will send free resources to help friends and classmates better understand what your child is going through and how they can help.&nbsp; 
&nbsp;</li><li>For children in pre-school and primary school <a href="https://www.campquality.org.au/">Camp Quality&rsquo;s</a> free puppet shows explain cancer and treatment effects in their own language and encourage kids to be supportive of a classmate who has a mum, dad, brother or sister impacted by cancer. Schools can book&nbsp;directly&nbsp;or you can contact one of Camp Quality&rsquo;s Family Liaison Coordinators on 1300 665 605 to ask them to contact the school.&nbsp;&nbsp;</li></ul>More advice/support&nbsp;Chat with a&nbsp;Canteen&nbsp;counsellor (1800 835 932) who can give you more advice about how to approach the school and relevant programs/resources.&nbsp;Useful sites/resources&nbsp;Canteen&rsquo;s&nbsp;booklet&nbsp;<a href="https://www.canteen.org.au/resource/cancer-affecting-students/">Cancer affecting your students? We can help you support them</a>&nbsp;details&nbsp;Canteen&rsquo;s&nbsp;programs and services to help schools support students who are affected by cancer.&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;

How You Can Help School Help Your Child When You Have Cancer

Coping with someone in the family having cancer is really challenging for many children and young people. Generally, with the right advice and support, you can support your child. But children/young people dealing with a parent&rsquo;s cancer are at high risk of psychological distress &ndash; so sometimes they may need professional help.&nbsp;Warning signs&nbsp;As a parent, it can be hard to&nbsp;know what&rsquo;s normal behaviour and what&rsquo;s a warning sign of a potential mental health issue.&nbsp;&nbsp;Sadness and worry are normal reactions&nbsp;for a child or young person&nbsp;when a parent has cancer.&nbsp;Particularly for teenagers, feeling&nbsp;down, tense, angry, anxious or&nbsp;disconnected&nbsp;are all normal emotions.&nbsp;But if these&nbsp;feelings seem overwhelming,&nbsp;persist&nbsp;for a long time and start to get in the way of their daily life,&nbsp;it could be depression or anxiety, and your child may need&nbsp;to talk to a professional.&nbsp;Warning signs that your child/young person may need professional help include any new and persistent changes (lasting more than one or two weeks), like:&nbsp;<ul><li>not enjoying, or not wanting to be involved in,&nbsp;things that they&nbsp;used to enjoy&nbsp;</li><li>not wanting to go to school&nbsp;</li><li>spending a lot of time alone and withdrawing from friends&nbsp;</li><li>changes in&nbsp;hygiene, eating habits,&nbsp;appetite or sleeping patterns&nbsp;</li><li>being easily irritated or angry for no reason&nbsp;&nbsp;</li><li>trouble concentrating or paying attention (e.g. their school grades dropping or&nbsp;performance at Uni/TAFE/work is not as good as it was)&nbsp;</li><li>risky behaviour that they would usually avoid, like taking drugs or drinking too much alcohol&nbsp;</li><li>talking about hurting themselves, wanting to die or suicide.&nbsp;</li></ul>Trust your instincts. You know your child well, so if you&rsquo;re concerned about how they&rsquo;re coping or any changes in behaviour, then it&rsquo;s worth talking to a professional.&nbsp;&nbsp;Where to get help&nbsp;There are many health professionals and organisations you can contact for help if you are concerned about your child&rsquo;s coping or behaviour, including:&nbsp;<ul><li>Your GP&nbsp;or specialist&nbsp;&ndash; may&nbsp;be able to talk to your child, or help you decide whether to consult a psychologist&nbsp;</li><li>Nurses &ndash; may be the most constant contact you have with the treatment centre and are a source of valuable information and support&nbsp;</li><li>Social workers &ndash; talk to patients every day about communication issues and have a wealth of knowledge about services&nbsp;</li><li>Psychologists and counsellors &ndash; can help you with communication and behavioural issues&nbsp;&nbsp;</li><li>School counsellors &ndash; are trained in&nbsp;child development and can be a great&nbsp;source of support and ideas&nbsp;</li><li>Psychiatrists &ndash; will see children with more serious issues (with a referral from your GP).&nbsp;</li></ul>&nbsp;More advice/support&nbsp;&gt;&nbsp;Contact&nbsp;Canteen&nbsp;(1800 ?? or <a target="_blank" rel="noopener" href="mailto:support@canteen.org.au">support@canteen.org.au</a>)&nbsp;to talk to&nbsp;one of our counsellors&nbsp;or get recommendations for the right support for your child.&nbsp;&gt;&nbsp;If&nbsp;your child insists nothing is wrong and refuses help, try texting or emailing them a link to&nbsp;Canteen&rsquo;s&nbsp;<a target="_blank" rel="noopener" href="https://canteen.org.au/join/">online community</a>&nbsp;where they can talk to other young people who&nbsp;get what they&rsquo;re going through&nbsp;or have a confidential and non-judgemental chat with a&nbsp;Canteen&nbsp;counsellor.&nbsp;Useful sites/resources

Canteen's community for parents whose family life is impacted by cancer