Months to live and all just so numb

So we were told this week that Luke has weeks to months to live and if he makes Xmas that is awesome.

We have been down this path before but with longer timeframes and it is all just surreal. We have been lucky enough to out live life expectancy by nearly two years.

We sat down with the boys to have “the conversation”. Our 14 yo said “I don’t believe them they were wrong before”, he is so right. Our 16yo kind of listened and shrugged it off, but we had our follow up chat (always recommend to tell them, give them time to process and then chat individually about it) and he told me he didn’t want dad to have the chemo as it’s not working and makes dad crook, I said fair enough and for him to talk to dad about that (which he did). Off he went to his part time job and he had a meltdown, work was awesome for him and he got to chat with friends. I am constantly touching base with the boys to make sure they are ok. I think as Luke deteriorates reality will set in.

We have organised a living wake (massive party) and invited everyone so luke gets to say goodbye. He said the other day when in hospital he didn’t want heaps of people gathered when he was dying, so this is the only way I know to stop that.

Cancer sucks but if I can help one of you by sharing my story then it makes it a little easier.